I checked the heartbeat for one last time before going to sleep. Even though I knew I would not get any sleep. I looked at the little girl lying in the cot and wondered what I had done to deserve something as severe as this. Was it because of the fight seven years ago? Did Ria curse me so badly? Did she ever want my child to be deformed? It was not new that I was thinking about Ria again. This was not the first time. Since the time I have come back to India I have been thinking of calling her and apologising. I was harsh and unreasonable. I don’t know every time I called Ananyaa to take Ria’s number I just couldn’t. Did I blame her for everything that happened? Do I still do? Or is it just ego?
Isn’t it time that I put all this ego behind me and made a new beginning. A new start. Why is it so hard? Why do I always want her to make the first move? Why can’t I make it? Is it so difficult? It was not entirely my fault seven years ago and it was not entirely her’s either. We both were to be blamed. I over reacted but she could have talked to me and sorted things out. Why didn’t she? Did she not consider me a friend good enough to keep for life. She did keep her friendship with Ananyaa but it wasn’t Ananyaa who fought with her. I did!
I reached for my phone and was about to dial Ananyaa’s number again when I heard a cry from the cot. The universe was giving me signs not to call her. Maybe it was for the best that I didn’t.